People Do Not Want People to Know

In my work, people do not want other people to know they have a chronic health issue. There is so much unnecessary shame and fear of being found out!

I get such great feedback from clients, which I am very grateful for. Sadly they do not want to let others know why they saw me, which means, other women in the same position are not aware what I do can help them. I fully understand, and would never put pressure on anyone to speak about anything personal to them. It is their privacy which they are unquestionably entitled to.

Sadly, there are both unconscious biases and know bias that are part of our culture. The misconceptions of clients are... I will be seen differently, I won't get the promotion, the responsibility for the big projects, it will be used against me in a competitive environment etc etc The reality is, people see you how you see yourself. It took me a few years to figure that out for myself.

Any kind of health issue, physical or mental emotional is often perceived as weakness. The irony of that, is that fear is the basis of that bias, and fear is what weakens us if we allow it. An example, your boss needs you to do your job competently in order for her to do her job competently. She knows someone, who knows someone! that had IBS…she thinks. That person did not do their job competently…she heard. She is now fearful you won’t do your job, therefor she fears, that will impact her position. I work mostly but not exclusively with women, so it makes more sense to refer to her in this case.

If communication is not open, your stress will feed off each other. Your shame and her fears. If communication is open and things aren’t hidden, it provides an opportunity to confront the fears in a rational and adult way. In order to do that, physically you have to feel strong. That requires energy. That’s where I can help you. That’s what makes those conversations possible. That’s what changes the outcome for you and the trajectory of your career.

So yes, I wish more people spoke publicly about why they came to see me, and in the meantime, I will do my very best to tell you how what I do can help you.